Remembrance Day

Im not in the Military (but several of my family members are). 

When I was 14, whilst on holiday with my dad and brother, we went to visit the grave of my Great Uncle who died in Italy during WW2. At the time, I thought the war cemetary was immaculate and that was important that the graves were tended to. But in all honesty, I didnt really feel anything...

Fast forward 10yrs later and I am working out at the gym, watching a televised service to celebrate Remembrance Day. It brought tears to my eyes as I felt guilty for not appreciating or understanding what my Great Uncle did for me. I vowed that I would return to his grave and pay him my respects, now humbled and with far greater understanding of what he did. 

I don't cry for my Dad on his birthday, nor on the anniversairy of his death in May 2015, but I do cry for him every year on this day.  He was a soldier, an officer, a commandar and the bravest man I will ever know (of course I never served with him, but those that did have quietly and privately over the years taken the time to tell me how brave he was).  He wasn't one of those bolshy officers, he commanded his men with intelligence and thought.  When on patrol in Ireland he was shot by a sniper, his men all heard the shot ring out and were all looking about to find out where the bullet had gone.  My Dad very calmly so as not to panic them said "I know where it went, now can we focus on finding where it came from!"

I could go on about him, about the medals he was given, but that would be little off topic for this thread.  those that are interested do read this:

http://www.oldframlinghamian.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=15368&g2_GALLERYSID=5ec974d35d0834123342d9966ace5d7f

(the picture of him was taken on my wedding day).

The point of this thread is the importance of this day.  Its momentous to me.  It reminds me every year of the brave and reminds me to be grateful for all those who have fought for our freedom.  I will always cry on this day, I'm not ashamed to cry its important to feel the enormity of the sacrafice so many have given for us.

Thanks for starting this thread Cliff Mdx

Sugar&Spice said

Im not in the Military (but several of my family members are). 

When I was 14, whilst on holiday with my dad and brother, we went to visit the grave of my Great Uncle who died in Italy during WW2. At the time, I thought the war cemetary was immaculate and that was important that the graves were tended to. But in all honesty, I didnt really feel anything...

Fast forward 10yrs later and I am working out at the gym, watching a televised service to celebrate Remembrance Day. It brought tears to my eyes as I felt guilty for not appreciating or understanding what my Great Uncle did for me. I vowed that I would return to his grave and pay him my respects, now humbled and with far greater understanding of what he did. 

Don't feel guilty. The fact that you have now have understanding and want to show your respect is enough.

I felt guilt several years ago (in the 80's) when playing cello in an orchestra in a theatre pit (I don't recall if it was an opera or musical).  I had been reading a war connected book between playing and as I finished it I turned to the viola player next to me ... an older friend.  I said to him, "What did you do in the war, Norman?"  He told me how, as an officer leading a unit fighting the Japanese, he had taken the decision to allow a young injured soldier to be left behind to be taken POW in order that the rest of his unit could retreat and regroup.  When they retraced their steps to mount another attack, they found that the young man he had left behind had not been taken prisoner, but instead had been tied to a tree and used for bayonet practise.  My simple question had opened a wound in Norman's memory which would clearly never heal.  I felt terribly sorry for asking the question, but my guilt again paled into insignificance compared to the suffering of my friend.

I honour Norman, you honour your great uncle and Jenni JJ honours her dad.  We can do no more.

Jenni JJ said

The point of this thread is the importance of this day. It reminds me every year of the brave and reminds me to be grateful for all those who have fought for our freedom. 

Thank you Jenni JJ for sharing the information on your dad.

Especially on such a poignant day.

I think of my grandad on this day. He was shot out of his aircraft twice during the Battle of Britain. His luck was that he was ditched in the North Sea and rescued. Many weren't. he went on to be the adjutant at RAF Felixstowe until it's closure in 1962 and his medal still forms part of the mayoral chain of office there.

I used to attend all Remembrance Day parades in my nearest town. A small, rural market town and it was humbling to see the old veterans and then as time passed and new conflicts arose, the much younger new veterans joining them. I spent the last eighteen and a half years of my NHS service in a category B prison as a prison nurse. That introduced me to many ex-military men and women who were (in the main) prison officers. I was a civilian. One thing that always hit home hard was that we did not need to see the news to know that a conflict had occurred because of the sudden rise in serving or recently discharged military men coming in as prisoners. There was a pattern. See active service. Suffer psychological trauma. React to that in public and get arrested for public order or fighting offences. Utterly tragic and a terrible waste.

Today I did not go into town. Today I went to the brand new War Memorial that was dedicated by a brief service. As our village has only been a parish for a short time (we ere represented by three parish councils that met, corner to corner by the old toll house) and we had been a very tiny village until recently (we are now getting quite big!) the list of fallen is very short but everyone listed lived in an identifiable house that still stands in the village today.

I was fearful that there would just be the parish council and the padre but the turnout was pretty good. Over sixty people, ranging in age from pre-school to old farts (like me!). I am sure as word gets round, that will increase over the years.

I did 11 years in the Naval reserves.

I feel quite embarrassed looking at my medals - just right place/ right time ones (golden jubilee and 10years good conduct). Nothing like the collections of campaign medals you see on days like this...

Jenni JJ said

I don't cry for my Dad on his birthday, nor on the anniversairy of his death in May 2015, but I do cry for him every year on this day.  He was a soldier, an officer, a commandar and the bravest man I will ever know (of course I never served with him, but those that did have quietly and privately over the years taken the time to tell me how brave he was).  He wasn't one of those bolshy officers, he commanded his men with intelligence and thought.  When on patrol in Ireland he was shot by a sniper, his men all heard the shot ring out and were all looking about to find out where the bullet had gone.  My Dad very calmly so as not to panic them said "I know where it went, now can we focus on finding where it came from!"

I could go on about him, about the medals he was given, but that would be little off topic for this thread.  those that are interested do read this:

http://www.oldframlinghamian.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=15368&g2_GALLERYSID=5ec974d35d0834123342d9966ace5d7f

(the picture of him was taken on my wedding day).

The point of this thread is the importance of this day.  Its momentous to me.  It reminds me every year of the brave and reminds me to be grateful for all those who have fought for our freedom.  I will always cry on this day, I'm not ashamed to cry its important to feel the enormity of the sacrafice so many have given for us.

Thanks for starting this thread Cliff Mdx

Good on you for posting this Jenni, very interesting. My Dad was 18 when he entered the Belsen concentration camp as a soldier. I have some video of him telling us about the horror he saw.

Edited by Paul Fretwell

12 years in the Royal Engineers, 6 with Bomb Disposal. My Dad was RAF and in Malaya. my Grandad was in WW1, India and WW2 (Home Guard). My Great Grandad was in the Boer War and WW1. I lost a few friends while in and will never forget them. 

Sugar&Spice said

Im not in the Military (but several of my family members are). 

When I was 14, whilst on holiday with my dad and brother, we went to visit the grave of my Great Uncle who died in Italy during WW2. At the time, I thought the war cemetary was immaculate and that was important that the graves were tended to. But in all honesty, I didnt really feel anything...

Fast forward 10yrs later and I am working out at the gym, watching a televised service to celebrate Remembrance Day. It brought tears to my eyes as I felt guilty for not appreciating or understanding what my Great Uncle did for me. I vowed that I would return to his grave and pay him my respects, now humbled and with far greater understanding of what he did. 

How bizarre.

On a school trip in the very early seventies, I visited one of the cemeteries in Northern France. At the time, I thought WOW, all those dead people, it kind of made an impression, but just like you, when I see images, film of them, I also feel guilty that while there, I wasn't moved to tears, or at the very least, much stronger emotions.  When younger, I lived in Newark, Nottinghamshire, there was a Polish War Cemetery there that I always marvelled at as it was so beautifully kept, which is one memory of my visit in France. 

For the last few years, and specifically today, I don't visit memorials, I go to the beach, which I have to do every day anyway, but I do take a minute of two, again, more poignantly today, to stare out to sea and think of all the people who gave all across the waters to keep us safe and in peace at home. 

My dogs actually behaved themselves today too, they laid down and didn't move until I did which meant I was able to feel I had at least stopped at 11.00 and taken time to remember.   I can do no more than have my thoughts, maybe share them as I am doing here.  I lost family members, only one who I would have actually met, but like most of us, go back to grandparents and great-relatives, we all have losses to our family trees. I also think about those who aren't, those who might have been had more survived and gone on to have families, or larger families than they already had.  They are the other forgotten ones in my mind. 

Stu H said

Thank you Jenni JJ for sharing the information on your dad.

Especially on such a poignant day.

Made me cry, but I like to remember and think about it.

Paul Fretwell said

Jenni JJ said

I don't cry for my Dad on his birthday, nor on the anniversairy of his death in May 2015, but I do cry for him every year on this day.  He was a soldier, an officer, a commandar and the bravest man I will ever know (of course I never served with him, but those that did have quietly and privately over the years taken the time to tell me how brave he was).  He wasn't one of those bolshy officers, he commanded his men with intelligence and thought.  When on patrol in Ireland he was shot by a sniper, his men all heard the shot ring out and were all looking about to find out where the bullet had gone.  My Dad very calmly so as not to panic them said "I know where it went, now can we focus on finding where it came from!"

I could go on about him, about the medals he was given, but that would be little off topic for this thread.  those that are interested do read this:

http://www.oldframlinghamian.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=15368&g2_GALLERYSID=5ec974d35d0834123342d9966ace5d7f

(the picture of him was taken on my wedding day).

The point of this thread is the importance of this day.  Its momentous to me.  It reminds me every year of the brave and reminds me to be grateful for all those who have fought for our freedom.  I will always cry on this day, I'm not ashamed to cry its important to feel the enormity of the sacrafice so many have given for us.

Thanks for starting this thread Cliff Mdx

Good on you for posting this Jenni, very interesting. My Dad was 18 when he entered the Belsen concentration camp as a soldier. I have some video of him telling us about the horror he saw.

Edited by Paul Fretwell

Dad never talked much about the horrors he saw.  Sometimes we'd talk about it, usually late at night over a glass of whiskey.  I miss those evenings. 

I did 10 and a half years in the Royal Air Force, both my Grandfather's served one in the WW1, and the other in WW2, although the later was a regular when WW2 broke out, my one Grandfather was injured in the trenches during WW1, my other Grandfather served in the Far East, and became a POW under the Japanese and didn't get home until 1946.

To be honest neither really every spoke about the wars, as I think was the way back then.

Edited by BC Photography

Memories of remembrance days past....... Me, one of the Guard of honour, decked out in BD uniform, white blancoed webbing, standing at one corner of the cenotaph. My reversed rifle muzzle was resting on the toecap of my highly polished boot and my head was bowed. I stood in silent stillness for nearly an hour in torrential rain. afterwards, the RSM made the 4 of us strip outside the barracks and throw the BD into a skip as the blanco had run badly and the BD was past saving, also, he didn't want blanco stains on the nice clean mess carpet. The rest of the afternoon was fuelled by alchohol, banter and a large mess dinner. I vaguely remember the hangover lasting several days.

RIP to all remembered on this day, some are remembered every day.

Jenni JJ said

I don't cry for my Dad on his birthday, nor on the anniversairy of his death in May 2015, but I do cry for him every year on this day.  He was a soldier, an officer, a commandar and the bravest man I will ever know (of course I never served with him, but those that did have quietly and privately over the years taken the time to tell me how brave he was).  He wasn't one of those bolshy officers, he commanded his men with intelligence and thought.  When on patrol in Ireland he was shot by a sniper, his men all heard the shot ring out and were all looking about to find out where the bullet had gone.  My Dad very calmly so as not to panic them said "I know where it went, now can we focus on finding where it came from!"

I could go on about him, about the medals he was given, but that would be little off topic for this thread.  those that are interested do read this:

http://www.oldframlinghamian.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=15368&g2_GALLERYSID=5ec974d35d0834123342d9966ace5d7f

(the picture of him was taken on my wedding day).

The point of this thread is the importance of this day.  Its momentous to me.  It reminds me every year of the brave and reminds me to be grateful for all those who have fought for our freedom.  I will always cry on this day, I'm not ashamed to cry its important to feel the enormity of the sacrafice so many have given for us.

Thanks for starting this thread Cliff Mdx

That's a great story of your Dad Jenni. It reminded me of earlier this year when I attended the funeral of my favourite Commanding officer, he was a Royal Navy Captain and utterly brilliant at his job and had so much respect from the men that served under him. I feel that had your Dad known him they would probably have been great friends. 

Huge respect for your Father and thanks so much for sharing your memories of him.

Pompeytog said

Jenni JJ said

I don't cry for my Dad on his birthday, nor on the anniversairy of his death in May 2015, but I do cry for him every year on this day.  He was a soldier, an officer, a commandar and the bravest man I will ever know (of course I never served with him, but those that did have quietly and privately over the years taken the time to tell me how brave he was).  He wasn't one of those bolshy officers, he commanded his men with intelligence and thought.  When on patrol in Ireland he was shot by a sniper, his men all heard the shot ring out and were all looking about to find out where the bullet had gone.  My Dad very calmly so as not to panic them said "I know where it went, now can we focus on finding where it came from!"

I could go on about him, about the medals he was given, but that would be little off topic for this thread.  those that are interested do read this:

http://www.oldframlinghamian.com/gallery2/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=15368&g2_GALLERYSID=5ec974d35d0834123342d9966ace5d7f

(the picture of him was taken on my wedding day).

The point of this thread is the importance of this day.  Its momentous to me.  It reminds me every year of the brave and reminds me to be grateful for all those who have fought for our freedom.  I will always cry on this day, I'm not ashamed to cry its important to feel the enormity of the sacrafice so many have given for us.

Thanks for starting this thread Cliff Mdx

That's a great story of your Dad Jenni. It reminded me of earlier this year when I attended the funeral of my favourite Commanding officer, he was a Royal Navy Captain and utterly brilliant at his job and had so much respect from the men that served under him. I feel that had your Dad known him they would probably have been great friends. 

Huge respect for your Father and thanks so much for sharing your memories of him.

Thank you so much - yes I'm sure they would have been friends.