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Confidence / Model Zoë Birtwhistle / Uploaded 15th October 2021 @ 11:26 PM
Model: Zoë BirtwhistleTags: carrots, dress, glam, kitchen, redGroups: (Invite) None

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Does any of this sound familiar?

“Oh, I love your outfit! I wish I had the confidence to wear something like that.”

“That top is so beautiful, but I could never carry it off myself.”

“I would love to be able to dress however I like, but I just don’t have the courage.”

“You must be so confident to wear the clothes you do.”

I suspect that we’ve all said things like this at one time or another, and have had others say it to us too. That this type of comment flows both ways suggests that the relationship between confidence and clothing is far from straightforward. Out of curiosity, I asked some friends how they feel about hearing it:

“People usually say it because they have a different body shape to me. It's sad: I create looks to support and inspire people, not to cause them to shy away from taking the chance of feeling amazing.”

"I've channelled my saviour complex into helping people to feel happier in their own skins. The idea that you have to be confident to wear what you want is completely back-to-front and must be unlearned."

“I tell people that confidence is a process. Every journey starts with a first step. Build up your tolerance gradually. Bright bag first, and then a red lip when that's going well.”

“It's a weird thing to respond to. It's almost a bit neggy. I sometimes get the feeling they're calling me an exhibitionist or tasteless or garish. But what can you reply apart from ‘oh, thank you, I just like it?’ It’s ironic: someone saying it to you can actually knock your confidence back a bit.”

“Did I use to dress so badly because I lacked confidence or did I lack confidence because I dressed so badly? When I put on my first pair of white skinny jeans and killer heels I instantly felt my confidence grow tenfold. Confidence is not a prerequisite for wearing fun clothes: the only thing you need are the clothes themselves. Waterfalls of confidence follow. Now I just tell people to take the plunge. Our time on earth is too precious to waste being badly dressed.”

Do people admire your clothes in terms of your confidence? How do you feel about it? How do you respond?